please empty your brain below
Were Nancy, Victoria and David actually real people, or just some bot?

Still Anon | 12.05.22 - 7:37 a.m. | #

How many of the messages were ". . . reaching out .." to you?
That seems pretty standard text for the PR stuff I get to my website about a specific cycling challenge linking Land's End and John O'Groats.

Rob Gullen | 12.05.22 - 7:51 a.m. | #

Yeah, when did 'contact' get replaced by 'reach out to'? I was wondering that only yesterday. It makes me feel slightly sick every time I hear it.

Sarah | Homepage | 12.05.22 - 8:17 a.m. | #

It is a real shame that all these self-proclaimed avid readers of your blog will not get to see your valuable feedback!

Tim W. | 12.05.22 - 8:34 a.m. | #

David clearly thinks that starting with Hi, then Hello and finally Hey is a progression that increasingly attracts attention.

Presumably these people must get responses from enough people to make it worthwhile which seems extraordinary.

I wonder whether stringing along Nancy, Victoria or David by asking a series of questions to provoke responses could be entertaining for you (and ultimately for us too).

Martin | 12.05.22 - 9:24 a.m. | #

A perfect "laugh-out-loud" post today! And I would rather by a million miles read about Corby and Kettering than predictable old Dubai and Monte Carlo.

cau1khead | 12.05.22 - 9:32 a.m. | #

In fairness to <Japanese restaurant>, it wasn't clear whether it was you or your date who preferred Garfunkels.

Jonathan Wadman | 12.05.22 - 9:44 a.m. | #

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
Diamond Geezer the next top Drag Race Bingo Caller!! Well it might go down well in Corby or Kettering!!

This selection was certainly worth the wait!

Cornish Cockney | 12.05.22 - 9:47 a.m. | #

Andrew | 12.05.22 - 10:02 a.m. | #

I thought the question of whether you preferred Garfunkels or Japanese was going to be an eternal mystery!

dg writes: pay more attention ;)

Alan | 12.05.22 - 10:18 a.m. | #

"Of course I saw your email. That's why I ignored it."

Brilliant!

I'll borrow that response when I reply to irritating and irrelevant PR pitches!

AlanBG | 12.05.22 - 3:56 p.m. | #

Sigh. Victoria and David clearly don't read the blog because during the day they've sent further follow-ups.

Victoria's fourth email urged me to respond because the deadline for award nominations is 'only three weeks away', and David's fifth was a repeat of his second.

I fear there'll be more...

diamond geezer | Homepage | 12.05.22 - 6:05 p.m. | #

I always thought Garfunkels was more faux American, like TGI Fridays or the like

Tom | 12.05.22 - 9:25 p.m. | #

Similarly, when a telephone caller starts out "How are you today?", I answer "very well thank you" and hang up.

Malcolm of Kent | 12.05.22 - 9:36 p.m. | #

'luxury cash-spaffers' made me laugh, brilliant description. Poor posh Victoria.

Jayne | 13.05.22 - 9:32 a.m. | #

I fear 'reach out' has become a normal phrase for a lot of people now and will only become more so. I inwardly cringe when I hear otherwise normal work colleagues using it.

There is a company that sells membership databases, sorry interactive community management, that emailed me weekly in my last job. Unfortunately they have now tracked me down to my current job. They have at least now added an unsubscribe button to their emails. What makes it worse is numerous colleagues who also receive their emails who then forward them on thinking I might be interested.

Anders | 13.05.22 - 1:55 p.m. | #

per Susie Dent's Twitter feed Bumf is a shortening of ‘bumfodder’, old army slang for loo paper; the first ‘red tape’ was the red ribbon used for binding legal papers.

Peewit | 13.05.22 - 2:34 p.m. | #

Perhaps a promotion for the freshly named Dangleway would tempt you.

H | 16.05.22 - 11:13 p.m. | #

Victoria's now on five and David's on six.

diamond geezer | Homepage | 17.05.22 - 7:41 p.m. | #











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