please empty your brain below
Well at least this Christmas has got to be better ...

Debster | Homepage | 23.12.10 - 12:26 a.m. | #

Tips:

Buy during the year as you see things people will like. The route to failure is trying to do it all last-minute.

People who like gardening can never have too many plants or bulbs. Or even blank labels. Never.

Other people can have magazine subscriptions (there's an online place where you can buy a voucher so they can choose their own if you don't know which one) or NT/EH/RHS subscriptions. Problem solved forever then.

Or ask people what they want. Kids always have lists a mile long anyway.

If you must give money, get a little something too (sweets, biscuits, socks, a festive plant...). But, I can guarantee it's the beginning of the end... you get to the stage where all you're doing is swapping vouchers or cheques, so have a pact with recipients to give it all up. We got to this stage about 5 years ago. It's a blessed relief.

I was going to say, make something (eg edible), but then I thought better of it ;)

But, ultimately, it's you they want to see, not the present, so have a good time. And, although, as the old cliche goes, time is a great healer, the first year is the worst, so, hope it's a time of happy memories not sad reflection.

Blue Witch | Homepage | 23.12.10 - 2:30 a.m. | #

A bold approach. I might have to try it myself following my woeful trip to Oxford Street yesterday - I was having much the same problem as you.

Best wishes for Christmas, dg.

martin | Homepage | 23.12.10 - 5:54 a.m. | #

All the best for Christmas, DG, hope there are happy memories as well as sad reminders this year.

Pippa | 23.12.10 - 7:49 a.m. | #

There is something particularly poignant about Christmas shopping when your shopping list is shorter by one, or in our case this year two, people who have always been central to the enjoyment of the festivities. Your support and love for your family is the best gift you can give them. Enjoy the good memories and hug each other lots. I'll be thinking of you.

Christine | 23.12.10 - 7:58 a.m. | #

I'm waiting to shop until 24/12/2010 23:59 - Local petrol forecourt. Everyone is getting a pine tree shaped air freshener this year. Sorted!!

Seriously Mr. Geezer, thanks for another year of wonderful words and pictures. It doesn't get said to bloggers often enough but I really do appreciate the time and effort you put into your blog. Thank you and Merry Christmas.

Andrew C | 23.12.10 - 7:58 a.m. | #

I second Pippa, Christine and Andrew's comments - described much better than I could write. Merry Christmas and thank you.

Tom | 23.12.10 - 8:57 a.m. | #

Nieces and nephews never mind getting money. I never go round shops in search of inspiration, it's too depressing. I look on the internet. And otherwise, what BW said. Although, let's face it, you're not going to get around to buying stuff all year round, not if you hate shopping anyway.

My family and I ask each other if there's anything we'd like. Can't fuss about these things.

Z | Homepage | 23.12.10 - 9:05 a.m. | #

& I'll second Andrew C's blogger related comments: thanks very much much for another year of entertaining daily missives.

Hope that christmas unfolds as you would wish it to.

arobba | 23.12.10 - 9:24 a.m. | #

I do not bother to buy any Christmas presents.
If I need to give someone a gift I put a Gift Voucher for a leading chain store in with their Christmas Card, then they can do their own shopping.
On the whole I try to keep Christmas very low key.

John | 23.12.10 - 9:29 a.m. | #

My partner and I abandoned Christmas presents for each other a few years ago. It does reduce the stress a bit. I'd love to extend, however my mum always says things like "I love buying presents!" every time I even get close to suggesting she might want to buy just a bit less than she always does.

Andrew Bowden | Homepage | 23.12.10 - 9:38 a.m. | #

You made me tear up reading this. I hope you manage to have a peaceful Christmas - as others have said, it must be better than last year.

And, happy christmas. Thank you for your posts. We had to move away from London during the year and while your posts make me miss London a lot, I do enjoy reading them.

(ps. food presents always go down well as they get eaten leaving no clutter. we decided not to spend any money on 'actual' presents this year - and made jam, chutney, sweets etc. that always seems to be appreciated far more than any other present i've ever bought. that said, it took all weekend to make it and bottle it.)

Rachel | Homepage | 23.12.10 - 9:41 a.m. | #

You're right, life's too short to worry about this sort of thing. People who know you will understand, people who don't understand aren't worth worrying about. Hope you survive the festive season.

Deptford Dame | Homepage | 23.12.10 - 10:03 a.m. | #

The trouble with buying stuff throughout the year is you forget where you've put it. I went into town yesterday for festive shopping and managed to buy one PS3 game (which had been specifically requested) and a calendar to put on our wall for next year. Other than that I couldn't find anything I could even think of buying. So much tat!

So this year it's money, apart from annual specifics like bottle of Drambuie for MIL, attached to something small and edible. I'm so glad my children are old enough that they're not hankering after this year's must-have plastic offering from Taiwan which costs a fortune and lasts next to no time.

I'm sure your presence at this time of year will be of much more value to your family than any present could be. At least you'll be together at the time when you need each other most.

Happy Christmas, DG!

allotmentqueen | 23.12.10 - 10:24 a.m. | #

I've given up on buying presents for most people - instead I buy them a school desk or a bee keeping set from one of the increasing charity gift schemes such as www.oxfam.org.uk/shop/oxfam-unwrapped

At least that way it shows I've thought of them and my £20 has hopefully done some good rather than buying a gift that sits in the corner for a year before being thrown out.

Wishing you a peaceful Christmas and thank you for sharing your thoughts with us over the year.

john | 23.12.10 - 10:36 a.m. | #

My experience of xmas after the death of a parent (for whom the gathering of the clan was really important) is that a small (possibly inconsequential) gift, appropriately wrapped is an essential element to the maintenance of family togetherness. Remember, it's not about you. Your presence is required though.

B | 23.12.10 - 10:55 a.m. | #

Shopping is always a problem.

I hope your Christmas is restful and as most of the others have said-thank you for the Blog.

It is part of my daily routine even if I don't empty my brain on here.


Amused | 23.12.10 - 1:37 p.m. | #

Others have already expressed this much more eloquently than I ever could. I love Christmas (lights, trees, bright-eyed children and endless carols), but there is a strong undercurrent of sadness to it. Especially when it coincides with the anniversary of such a loss.

I do wish you a very Merry Christmas, DG. I'm another one who wouldn't miss your blog for anything.

Rose | 23.12.10 - 1:51 p.m. | #

I would like to second Andrew's comment- Thanks for great blog.
I hate gift cards. It' not the gift that matters, it's the thought put into it.
A nice pair of gloves or wooly scarf is good. Books are always awesome. Nobody hates a Bathroom Reader. Candles, homemade food items, fancy teas but not all packed together, cd's, framed photos, tea towels, hand cream, specialized tools.... Hope the list is helpful. One year for my mother's birthday, I took all of her photos, loose and in an album, bought enough albums to place them in, sorted them, made copies of the old and fragile and handed them back and that was my gift. I think she liked it.

Ileen | 23.12.10 - 1:52 p.m. | #

Books, booze, flowers, food
None go to waste and everyone likes them - that's my strategy anyway

gilly | 23.12.10 - 2:05 p.m. | #

Hear! Hear!
"Seriously Mr. Geezer, thanks for another year of wonderful words and pictures. It doesn't get said to bloggers often enough but I really do appreciate the time and effort you put into your blog. Thank you and Merry Christmas."

parktown | 23.12.10 - 2:28 p.m. | #

I just Argos it for the kids. Least hassle and keeps them happy for now. For everyone else, as you say: it's the thought that counts.

Jag | Homepage | 23.12.10 - 3:06 p.m. | #

Thanks for your daily blog - hope Xmas goes well and you all have a good Xmas together. Thats what matters.

Dave B | 23.12.10 - 3:46 p.m. | #

Not much to add to what others have said, but I do wish you all the best for Christmas.

disgruntled | Homepage | 23.12.10 - 3:53 p.m. | #

I know the feeling DG, and it would be lovely if one could just buy for those people for whom you've seen something particularly appropriate that year; but that doesn't work because the others would be terribly offended. I guess it's the price we pay for being fallen humans.
With your writing genius you could write a little personalised story for everyone, a good ghost tale for them to read to each other at the end of the evening?
Anyway, many thanks for the blog, and for giving me so many good ideas for things to see and do in London.
Merry Christmas. RogerB

RogerB | 23.12.10 - 4:46 p.m. | #

Well done on the money gifts, am sure the family appreciate your company more.

Hope you have a good time and have happy memories

Joe | 23.12.10 - 4:51 p.m. | #

Have you considered having a pact to not purchase anything other than for children under 16?

Enjoy Christmas and all the best for the New Year

John Kelly | 23.12.10 - 5:23 p.m. | #

Extended family only ever send mine money now. It's easier being so far away from us and the kids have huge plans for spending it, as even small amounts add up between them all!

Their stocking fillers are full of soda cans and nibbles too, as I'm so fed up with tossing out the carefully chosen items every spring!

My thoughts are with you throughout this season, but especially today DG.

CornishCockney | 23.12.10 - 5:32 p.m. | #

Hear hear! Superb and spot on post as ever DG. I think most of those of us born in 1965 must be Christmas shopping gene deficient.

Thinking of you today and over Christmas.

All the best fella
Cxx

Christian | 23.12.10 - 5:53 p.m. | #

I'm with you, DG: lunchtime today I 'realised' I had not bought my partner a gift. I am so averse to the accumulation of *stuff* - especially the *stuff* one tends to accumulate at Christmas - I genuinely forgot. I might pick up a couple of pieces of clothing in the sales. Maybe.

On a serious note, have a good one, DG: as has been said by others, this Christmas will be hard but surely better than last year's.

EskimoPie | 24.12.10 - 12:10 a.m. | #

Yes, thanks for your blog over the year. I lived in London for decades - now in Oxford, which I like, but it's fascinating to read about my real home town and its history.

Christmas ... wouldn't it be lovely if we could just dance and sing round a bonfire for a few hours. But one has to do the presents. I was very hard up one year, about 30 years ago, and asked my family if I could give up the presents for only that year - given or received. This was disastrous! People got the hump and I'd never attempt it again! - haven't had to, luckily, but it's much better to struggle with the norm. And there is a pleasure in giving people things they like. We're lucky in Britain in that we still do have a strong welfare state, whatever people say, and don't have the mutual (year round!) gift-giving for survival culture which so many countries have.

Best wishes for Xmas. The evenings start getting lighter more quickly after c. 2 Jan - thank goodness!



Vivien | 24.12.10 - 1:04 a.m. | #

I do not agree with Vivien saying "one has to do the presents", it is not compulsory, remember the first gifts given by the wise men were not to each other but to the child Jesus. Not at his birth but later, probably several months later.(It was the Shepherds who went to the baby in the manger). Maybe we should just give gifts to children.

However Vivien, I agree it is nice to pass 21st December and know that the daylight hours are increasing.

John | 24.12.10 - 7:29 a.m. | #

@John. I totally agree with you about the gifts. My younger relations (aged under 12) get a little gift from me, but - at my instigation - the older children chose a Unicef school-building project in a third world country to receive the money. They get so much "stuff" as it is, they don't need appallingly unfashionable socks from their old auntie.

Great Aunt Annie | 24.12.10 - 6:58 p.m. | #

What Andrew C said. (And Pippa)
Best wishes for a Happy Christams and thanks for another year of great posts

RogerW | 25.12.10 - 4:11 p.m. | #

The best present my Dad and I gave each other one Christmas was the freedom from stress and expectations involved in present choosing and we opted not to be buying each other Christmas presents. It worked. Now this pattern is extended to include lots of others. If I find something that I feel sure somebody would like then I give it to them at the first opportunity - not save it until December 25th.

Paula: Grandma P's Ramblings | 27.12.10 - 6:42 p.m. | #











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