dg comments

please empty your brain below

And don’t take a bus, tube, tram or train to travel to your non-essential shop.

Roger French | Homepage | 15.06.20 - 8:17 a.m. | #

DG’s satire back at its biting best. Brilliant!

Toni | 15.06.20 - 8:21 a.m. | #

I rarely disagree or feel uncomfortable with your stance on an issue, but you are being uncharacteristically snide here, DG: all this retail activity is a vital part of a strong economy that helps us all, and many people take pleasure both in seeing thriving high streets, and buying tat themselves from time to time.

Phil C | 15.06.20 - 8:23 a.m. | #

My son runs a model railway shop - the very epitome of non-essential. But they had panic buyers back in March. The trouble is it's a very small shop and the clientele all cough at the best of times. What happens to small non-essential shops who would rather not open (yet), or who can't do so safely and/or economically viably?

Sarah | Homepage | 15.06.20 - 8:29 a.m. | #

The snark level is high today it seems. While I think all right-thinking people are still concerned about staying well and not spreading the virus, there are many small businesses who need to start gradually adjusting to a new normal. Also, what might seem like an essential purchase to you or I might be something which supports someone else's wellbeing. I can think of a woman in my street who knits and sews which help her maintain her mental wellbeing - she's been desperate to get back to the store because buying fabrics is essentially a tactile experience.

I'm beginning to wonder if DG isn't suffering the effects of lockdown himself in recent days.

Barry Homeowner | 15.06.20 - 8:42 a.m. | #

Wood is the new toilet paper, there's almost none left!

Sarah: My local train shop has been doing a roaring trade over the lockdown too. A couple of weeks ago the owner dropped off an order for me as it felt a bit odd to mail something when the shop is only 1.5 miles away!

Southern Heights (Light Railway) | 15.06.20 - 8:42 a.m. | #

Ignoring whether England has reduced COVID to a level where this is safe, I'm concerned that this new queue-and-facemask style of shopping will be much less popular than what we had before.

Despite a potential slump in sales, these retailers still have rent to pay and rising wage bills as they are weaned off the furlough scheme.

Will there be enough customers to keep them running? Or is this our last chance to see the high street before it changes forever?

Rob | 15.06.20 - 8:42 a.m. | #

I shop therefore I am...

Brian | 15.06.20 - 8:47 a.m. | #

While I'm sympathetic to shop owners, who will generally be under economic pressure, they can choose to stay closed for now. Whereas shop employees have no choice in the matter, if their shop is opening, they are required, whether they like it or not.

Malcolm | 15.06.20 - 8:50 a.m. | #

the trouble is the great con of modern capitalism has been revealed. most of the stuff we buy is non-essential, and the uk economy has been propped up by inflated house prices and people buying stuff they don't need for many many years now

bert | 15.06.20 - 9:25 a.m. | #

During lockdown my model railway has not only been taken out of storage for the first time in 45 years, but has almost doubled both in extent and fleet size, keeping both the model shops and ebay (and DPD) in business.

Timbo | 15.06.20 - 9:25 a.m. | #

The great unwashed need to keep buying crap to support our fragile economy. Heaven forbid they could actually not buy anything and just sit and think about their lives instead.

Adam | 15.06.20 - 9:27 a.m. | #

More nastiness from you, plus another jibe at Barnard Castle - you seem to enjoy joining the mob to attack, but when it came after you last week...

Surbitonian | 15.06.20 - 9:27 a.m. | #

Mixed responses to this. I'm in two minds really. I want to go back to work because otherwise I feel there's a genuine risk I'll murder my housemates. But on the other hand I secretly enjoy sitting on my furloughed arse spending no money.

Furlough is the crucial thing here though. Once the safety net is pulled away, the bookshop I work for is dependent on people coming to town, Central London no less, and buying stuff.

I can't speak for the general populace but the act of touching a book causing it to be quarantined for 72 hours kind of ruins the appeal of going to a physical bookshop. I'd feel so incredibly guilty knowing that I'd made that book unsellable. What if it's the only copy left? From my experience of working in retail, perhaps the customers won't be quite so conscientious.

Also, realistically, if it's a case of giving said book a quick wipe down or losing a sale, I know what most businesspeople would encourage their staff to do.

So then it begs the question, what's the point? If customers are 'politely' discouraged from touching the books, they might as well buy them on Amazon. All the people who say they prefer to go to a 'real' shop are simply a little resistant to the culture shift that is inevitable. I used to be resistant too, but since I started ordering stuff online and the world didn't collapse around me I can't imagine I'll go back to enduring Ilford high road ever again.

There's a hypocrisy in the fact that I don't want the company I work for to go bust yet I have welcomed the shift to online. But it's going to happen soon enough and I don't think there's anyway of stopping it

Daniel | 15.06.20 - 9:34 a.m. | #

I feel we need to get back to the days when you can get out and about, highlighting the quirks and curiosities of old London town. That's what made this blog unique. Perhaps it's time to revisit old blogs, and with the help of Google maps (other mapping is available) use your usual skill with words to craft something informative, entertaining and memorable.

Stuart Render | 15.06.20 - 9:43 a.m. | #

Very much looking forward to seeing drinkers in pubs sucking their pints with a straw through a hole in their tightly fitting soggy face masks.

It's just a matter of time/straining every sinew/scientific advice/blah blah blah...

SteveSpam | 15.06.20 - 9:46 a.m. | #

I do hope that you managed to arrange a suitably profitable sponsorship agreement with 'Non £ss£ntial Discounts' 😉

Perhaps they'll give you a good deal on your next purchase of a beach ball and green flip-flops, useful if you nip down to Southend at the weekend 😎

Kevin Too | 15.06.20 - 9:55 a.m. | #

Another excellent post DG!

I think the mix of responses reflects that this is simply a tough balancing act. On one hand, there's the immediate risk of catching COVID-19, but on the other hand, we need taxes to pay for the NHS and provide us with a safety net. Whichever side you prioritise, there's no easy solution.

Thank you for giving us some light relief from the strange times we find ourselves in.

James Armitage | Homepage | 15.06.20 - 9:57 a.m. | #

A slightly unpleasant tone, considering the millions of people whose livelihoods depend on the retail sector. Imagine the alternative where all the shops have shut down, and the only "retail" jobs are as a delivery driver or in an Amazon warehouse

And it's easy for the Welsh and Scottish government to take the high ground, as they don't have to pay the crippling costs of Furloughing workers, and the unemployment/universal benefit after their employer has gone bankrupt.

I won't be rushing to the shops today, and yes the whole shopping experience will be grim, but we have to start somewhere.

Mikey C | 15.06.20 - 9:59 a.m. | #

Great post. Lockdown and the gradual easing of restrictions has clearly highlighted what is and isn’t essential.

We have the perfect opportunity to rebuild the economy in a more sustainable manner. Unfortunately those in power profit from the status quo so we’re all being encouraged to return to our polluting, planet warming ways for the sake of the “economy”.

Beanie | 15.06.20 - 9:59 a.m. | #

To come to the correct decision in terms of the trade offs required in balancing the need to save lives in relation to Covid-19, save lives in relation to all the other ailments people suffer from and protect the economy which provides the money to pay for our public services requires the judgement of Solomon.

The pressure and stresses on those who make those decisions are not ones I would like to bear.

Kutgw | 15.06.20 - 10:04 a.m. | #

Without people travelling central London retail is dead.

DG good but not enlightening read. We all buy some non essentials I'm sure.

chicker | 15.06.20 - 10:33 a.m. | #

Least said soonest mended so no comment from me on the obvious dominoes that are toppling on the High St. But the loss of rental income will soon cause losses and write-downs for commercial landlords reinforced by reduced demand for office space as people work from home. Fewer jobs will reduce demand for housing as fewer people are attracted to the UK and those left have to 'bunk up' together. Less buying of non-essentials does mean less imports but those countries are then less able to afford the services which make up the majority of our exports. Lockdown will be nothing compared to what is to come.

Brightside (aka Cassandra) | 15.06.20 - 10:43 a.m. | #

Phew,panicked there for a minute,no DG blog to read before we raced out to get to the supermarket for our allotted shopping time,8-9. Oh well,we thought,he has probably run down to the Westfield centre to buy a hairclipper or curler and he wants to be early in the queue.😉

Jo W | 15.06.20 - 10:45 a.m. | #

Great Photoshoppery DG! The real shop at 567 Roman Road is almost as impressive:
[Streetview]

Charles | Homepage | 15.06.20 - 10:52 a.m. | #

I'm not sure I'd call books non-essential, especially for those who live on their own. Buying from Amazon is a lot more expensive than going to a charity shop and buying some books, and you can only select an Amazon day for delivery for books ordered directly through Amazon. Otherwise, if you can't select a specific day for your delivery and you're not sure which day it will be you can't go out for a walk or food shopping until the delivery happens. There's only so much stuff to watch on TV and on the internet, and if you get through books quickly you do have to venture out to restock every so often.

Richard | 15.06.20 - 11:08 a.m. | #

Good to see you decided to take a risk with this follow up satire piece, DG! Once again - lots to think about here, between your post and the resulting comments. Some uncomfortable thoughts and emotions also arose for me, which I think is a good thing.

If I had to pick a theme for today, it would seem to me to be about the choices we’ve had to make through this crisis, including this new phase and pressure to return to some kind of ‘normal’. Who / what is essential, and who gets to decide that? Should we follow the rules and advice, or find ways to go against them? Do the needs of the economy trump health concerns, or are they perhaps linked in some way? Etc etc.

PS A contribution for Pedants’ Corner (because you seemed so disappointed last time) - I believe it should be ‘hair dryer’ under point five, not ‘hairdrier’.

Sam | 15.06.20 - 11:32 a.m. | #

Touching is usually a necessity of shopping. If everything was isolated the minute it had been touched, there would be very little left to buy!

The only books I usually buy new are non-fiction books new (and even that is very rarely these days). If I want to buy a book that may be priced at £20 - £40, I will usually want to look through that book to see if I can persuade myself that I really need it for that price!

Comparing different items to see which is the most suitable, trying to read the ridiculously small print that gives the details, etc. I just assume that anything I pick up is contaminated. Even if no customers have touched something, an item would have been put there by staff who have touched it in the first place and may still be contaminated if it hasn’t been there for long.

As for trolleys and baskets being sanitized before use, don’t bet on it. Depending on the layout, most trolleys are just recycled – customer takes trolley, customer returns trolley, next customer picks up trolley. There are rarely staff available who will take a trolley and sanitize it before its next use. The ideal situation is where sanitizer and wipes are available for the customer to do this themselves, but I’ve not seen this in the few shops I’ve been in

rogmi | 15.06.20 - 11:32 a.m. | #

OK, DG, I admit, you had me going to Street View to check out the establishment at 567 Roman Road...

TheLupineOne | 15.06.20 - 11:42 a.m. | #

I've read this blog for years, and while I've not always agreed with the author, generally respect their viewpoint and enjoyed the content nonetheless. However, this past few weeks I've noticed a drift towards a rather unpleasant attitude: I'm doing lockdown more rigorously than you, I use less non-essential things than you, etc. That has led to the satire landing as a sort of exceptionalist rant which isn't pleasant and alienates some of us struggling with families who aren't together or relying on jobs which are desperately at risk. Sorry Diamondgeezer, you're coming across as aloof, uncaring and just plain rude at times.

Barry Homeowner | 15.06.20 - 11:56 a.m. | #

Westfield this morning was unexpectedly busy, with more activity than a normal Monday.

Most shops were queueless but there were a number of long lines, appropriately spaced, especially outside shoe shops, phone shops and the Apple Store.

Even Flying Tiger - the epitome of a non-essential store - had 30 customers waiting patiently outside.

But the malls themselves were a bit of a free-for-all with no evidence of a functional one-way system, and groups of shoppers milling everywhere, hence somewhat uncomfortable.

I wouldn't recommend a visit, especially if it gets any busier.

diamond geezer | Homepage | 15.06.20 - 11:58 a.m. | #

No economy - no NHS.

David | 15.06.20 - 12:06 p.m. | #

Cuba has had its economy totally trashed by the U.S over the years. Andyet it has arguably the best health service on the planet. It depends where your priorities lie.

Malcolm | 15.06.20 - 12:17 p.m. | #

Thank you for acknowledging the workers risking their lives for reopening.

However, I have to say that as much as I feel that stores should not be putting their employees at risk, my first iced coffee in months tasted really very good this morning in a largely deserted Starbucks.

Ann | 15.06.20 - 12:22 p.m. | #

I think it's interesting that a number of people are commenting on the 'tone' of this piece in a way that they wouldn't have done before last week sensitised them (us?). DG has been writing in this style for years and I for one wish him many more. It really is quite tiresome to pick up on one little thing that rubs you up the wrong way when no one's forcing you to read the piece in the first place.

Sarah | Homepage | 15.06.20 - 12:32 p.m. | #

Given the rather extreme measures being taken to sanitise books in a bookshop, public libraries are presumably going to be unviable for the foreseeable future. (I guess that one would look through more books per visit when not directly paying for them).

Alastair Scott | 15.06.20 - 12:39 p.m. | #

The virus does not go through the skin (as far as I know) and you should not lick your fingers anyway (at least not before you wash them carefully). So I think this book quarantine is a bit too much.

Distance and masks (FFP2 if you have or can get them) should be enough.

MK | 15.06.20 - 12:55 p.m. | #

Thanks, Sarah, for your comments - DG is free to write what he wants. If people don't like it then they won't visit and the world won't end. I suspect that DG would keep writing even if no-one visited the blog - we know about the amazingly detailed diaries he kept when younger and this is a kind of continuation of that.

I can't work out if we're going completely over the top with the worries about infection control. At the start of lockdown we knew very little about who was infected and he risks. Now we know more - for example, PHE tells me that in Hammersmith & Fulham (where I live) there were 4 new cases last week and 7 the week before). This will be under-counting - some people won't have symptoms, others will just stay at home and not tell anyone but even if there were 400 new cases last week how likely am I to be infected by them given that the population of the borough is nearly 200,000?

If no-one in the shopping centre is infected then it really doesn't matter how close they come to me or how much they handle the clothes books etc.

Steve Rochford | 15.06.20 - 1:18 p.m. | #

These populist articles may get the all-important 'hits' and comments for your blog DG but I yearn for the good old days when you'd happily write about the likes of the 69F bus service which operates between East Cheam and Walford on the second Tuesday of every month.

dg writes: Two days ago.

milliem | 15.06.20 - 1:24 p.m. | #

Spot on dg. After three months of lockdown we may have lost our appetite for non essential tat.

coffin dodger | 15.06.20 - 1:31 p.m. | #

Well that's where we are: between a rock and a hard place. Unless we did lockdown-proper, like in China (as in not going past the front door or your property/block/compound and having everything delivered), then we have to live on a sliding scale of risk vs. safety.

The crucial matter is the 2-metre or not 2-metre question. People that I know are putting a lot of effort and expense into 2m, which could be batted away by the mere wiff-of-a-waff at any time. I very much stand on the side of caution on this. Some of the workarounds are very inventive, like my local library. Considering the terrible pressures of the austerity years, the staff have moved mountains to come up with this.

NickW | 15.06.20 - 2:05 p.m. | #

The reactions may vary according to economics, perhaps if you're economically secure you can look upon this post as satire, alternatively if you've remortgaged your house to set up a business that hasn't traded for 3 months, you may look upon this post as insensitive.

Still Anon | 15.06.20 - 2:38 p.m. | #

Like Sarah, I think a post like this would not have been seen as negative in the past. Some people's attitudes have changed and they feel they are being laughed at when they should be enjoying the humour.

popartist | 15.06.20 - 2:44 p.m. | #

Spt on DG.
I want to go to Primark purely to see all the empty rails and displays, where instead of being dropped on the floor, the rummaged items have been whisked away to quarantine!!

Otherwise my thoughts echo those of bert - 9:25 a.m. The lockdown has really highlighted how our economy seems to be run on non-essential spending. A model that is not only bad for a stable economy, but a disaster for the planet.

Cornish Cockney | 15.06.20 - 2:45 p.m. | #

I totally agree with the comment by Sarah @ 12:32pm

Amazingly there are some 'articles' out there on the interweb that I don't agree with, but fortunately there is also a 'back' or 'next' function on my browser 🤔

Seems to me that some people are far happier to moan than click on by...

I'm an essential shopper only, once a week click & collect from ASDA, it's all I can afford and need thankfully 🛒

DG I hope you were fully masked and gloved for your Westfield visit 😷

Kevin Too | 15.06.20 - 3:28 p.m. | #

I'm with Sarah (and others) on this. Too many people are now determined to take offence at anything they disagree with and trumpet their feelings on the internet. This is another excellent piece of writing that exposes some of the different difficulties endured by us all - of whatever persuasion - over the centuries.

Mike Roberts | 15.06.20 - 3:37 p.m. | #

Mystified as to why shops have reopened when the virus is nowhere near under control.

Everything is moving too far, too fast compared to other countries.

I can only assume that somewhere a calculation has been made that, it doesn't matter that the virus is still out there as the hospitals now have a bit more room.

Unconvinced there'll be a particularly meaningful boom as we can get everything online.

This period has hammered home to me how infrequently I ever needed to go to a physical shop to look at stuff.

E | 15.06.20 - 3:40 p.m. | #

Shops reopened in Poland - 4th May
Shops reopened in Belgium - 11th May
Shops reopened in Denmark - 11th May
Shops reopened in France - 11th May
Shops reopened in Switzerland - 11th May
Shops reopened in Germany - 16th May
Shops reopened in Portugal - 18th May
Shops reopened in Italy - 18th May
...
Shops reopened in England - 15th June

diamond geezer | Homepage | 15.06.20 - 3:52 p.m. | #

E says '... the virus is nowhere near under control'.

That may well be true in some regions but in London the number of new cases and deaths each day has fallen to very low levels, and has been like that for at least a fortnight. Given that it's a city of 9m people, the virus has - in statistical terms - virtually disappeared from London.

Nightmale | 15.06.20 - 4:01 p.m. | #

You can never say a virus has disappeared as it simply goes underground so to speak. What Boris is hoping for is that more people go shopping than die from the relaxation of the lockdown. Anyway he has enough problems with Brexit and Cummings to be worried about the virus now

Tones | 15.06.20 - 4:36 p.m. | #

The comments here are beginning to resemble those under any trashy newspaper online story.

It's very tiresome.

If you don't like what you read, then click on by people.

Don't spoil it for the long-term readers, who know exactly what we are getting, and love it, please.

Blue Witch | Homepage | 15.06.20 - 5:43 p.m. | #

I'll just leave this here...
[I'm Going Shopping, on Spotify]

Steve | Homepage | 15.06.20 - 5:44 p.m. | #

My model railway is in my sons loft as I have no room for one. He is 15 miles away and shielding so no trains have run for three months.

I have been reading, watching tv and looking at the internet so decided to test my eye sight and driving skill and made a quick visit to retrieve some locomotives. I now run said locomotives on a yard of track on my bedroom window sill(cill).A degree of happiness restored.

Further I have not ridden on a bus or train since 15th March with no prospect for the near future. Life has become very boring.
Keep safe everyone.

James | 15.06.20 - 6:47 p.m. | #

As an online shopping veteran, I'm going to continue risking the health of warehouse workers rather than add to the crush on the high street

M | 15.06.20 - 8:15 p.m. | #

My granddaughter, nearly 12, was desperate to go shopping and her kind mother indulged her, having made masks and being willing to queue. I had no desire to do any such thing so gave her extra pocket money. I did go to independent shops in my little town and spend about £70, which seems a reasonable compromise. I don't want more shops to go out of business but I don't want to visit big towns and have a pretty miserable experience. I do want to have lunch out at local pubs, though, and have a list of favourites to visit as soon as possible.

Z | Homepage | 15.06.20 - 9:06 p.m. | #

GO SHOPPING
SPEND MONEY
SAVE BORIS
The purpose of satire is to encourage us to see things from a different and even perverse angle. As others have suggested, this item successfully draws attention to the surreal nature of our economy, that now seems to rely on us spending money on shopping and eating, encouraging people who can ill afford it to start exposing themselves to danger and bash their credit cards again to buy things they don't really need, ie 'non-essential'. It's now clear we don't have an economy that's built on solid foundations at all, unless we can persuade more people to -
BUY A LAND ROVER.

ActonMan | 15.06.20 - 9:32 p.m. | #

For those of us planning a trip to Barnard Castle for our partner's birthday (and who amongst us would do anything else) ... TripAdvisor lists 7 retail experiences to enjoy.

A | 15.06.20 - 11:12 p.m. | #

Almost ALL of the above comments are applicable to the USA. WE are all living in a strange new world. ( I live in a Maryland suburb of Washington, District of Columbia.)

Garth | 15.06.20 - 11:23 p.m. | #

A new meaning to SHOP UNTIL YOU DROP?!

ActonMan | 16.06.20 - 12:46 a.m. | #

Who wants to shop in such a dystopian environment? Mindless queuing. Go here. Go there. Stand in this place, no browsing, no trying anything on etc. Everywhere you look the reminder you might catch the “dreaded lurgi” at any moment. Project Fear. Until shops return to normal, and not the “new” one they keep pushing, my discretionary spend money stays in the bank. And now the additional pleasure of half-suffocating under s mask there and back. No thanks, and this goes for the “new” pubs too.

Kim | 16.06.20 - 1:08 a.m. | #

On-line is the “new normal” for shopping when you’re furloughed as you’re always in for the delivery. But what happens when furloughing ends and you have have to go back to your old job? What do you mean “What job?”

Lockdownsceptic | 16.06.20 - 1:15 a.m. | #

How brave of Boris to pop down to Westfield Stratford whilst it was empty. I for one won't be going anywhere near a shopping centre until it's clear that a second spike isn't coming from the demonstrations and the breakdown of lockdown. But in honesty, there is no reason for me to venture to shops, as everything I need can be ordered online.

Sarah has hit the nail on the head with her comment so I won't say any more about that, other than to flag to disgruntled readers that refunds are available from the usual place : )

E1W-er | 16.06.20 - 12:38 p.m. | #

Good news is Grant Shapps says you can take a car to your non-essential shop. Anyway TfL certainly don’t want your custom. They finally got rid of the “green crap”.

Kim | 16.06.20 - 5:24 p.m. | #

Some warehouses are highly mechanised, providing a high degree of social distancing for the remaining manual workers (which can be further enhanced with some simple changes)

But this favours handling bulk stocks of a limited range of items (for bulk deliveries or small customer orders) and can be inflexible.

High volume mechanization is a huge investment (and 18+ months design/build/commission). Amazon is not in that space, though.

MilesT | 16.06.20 - 7:10 p.m. | #

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