please empty your brain below

And I thought all thse flags were my English National Pride spell finally working. Now you tell me it's for a thing called football. Heartbroken I am.

You almost wrote that too convincingly, you know. And I mean that as a compliment from someone whose heart sinks when he sees all those fluttering St George's flags and hates overhearing conversations like these.

The next few weeks are going to be hell, mostly because of the incessant nationalistic braying of lagered-up football fans who think that just because England won the World Cup once - once! - and football is supposedly the national game, then we have a god-given right to win it every time. I am going to hide.

I'm so looking forward to the World Cup: I do hope Liverpool win. And I should imagine that Kevin Keegan will aquit himself very well.

Three Lads are singing for Ingerland too: www.threelads.com

Hope this is the last we will read on DG about WC. Bet England go down the pan.

Ah yes, I knew there was a reason I moved to Scotland

I got me a HD box and discovered to my joy it seems to contain many episodes of Father Ted in the TV on demand bit. No football here!

That was so beautiful.

I cried.

To think some advertising guru actually thought a fat John Barnes could sell Mars Bars!?

Oh - and we've actually beaten Germany three times: One World Cup and two World Wars. (Hillarious innit, mate?)

Cheer up! bloody hell it only happens once every four years. Geez.

Is that what the flags are for then?I'll not be watching kick ball, my TV will remain off for the duration

This is one of those rare instances when you are wrong, DG. It will be a fantastic tournament. People will love it at home and abroad and then life will return to normal so please don't mock me!

Oh, and given London's role at the heart of the global anti-apartheid movement I'm sure you could write something genuinely interesting about the significance of holding the World Cup in South Africa. Please? At some point in the next four weeks?

Oh I agree with DG.

But on the "Scotland" thing. Hmmm. I wonder how many Stars and Stripes are flying in Glasgow today? To be rapidly replaced, as part form dictates, by flags of Algeria and Slovenia (although I'd wager that a fair number of flags of Slovakia will go up instead, by mistake, as let's face it they are similar in appearance as well as name)? In some ways I reckon that's even worse!

No, we haven't ever beaten Germany in a world cup, Kim. We did once manage to beat West Germany. What year was that ? Oh and that involved an amazing goal by England in extra time in the final that completely defied the laws of physics. The alternative possible explanation (it wasn't a goal) never gets talked about.

Of course the flags might be for the England Cricket test matches!

I wouldn't mind wearing this England Badge

Sneaked off home to see opening game.
Managed to cancel Saturday night’s dinner with wife’s friends.
And YES I’m going to enjoy reading, talking, arguing about footie until July 11th.
I can remember the euphoria of 66 and YES we most certainly need some GOOD NEWS to brighten up our days
Also, I’m upset that a Gooner should write a disparaging blog over the national game.
Englaaaaaaaaaaand................... Englaaaaaaaaaaand...................ENGLAAAAND.

The Ireland rugby team are touring New Zealand at the moment, if anyone's interested...

LOL I loved reading this. Canadians don't even have a team entered. We seem to focus on hockey here, not soccer (aka football). It appears that Canadian fans cheer & drink for their family's mother country or... whichever team has the hottest guys in shorts...yay! :D

The Mars Bar is, of course, an English invention.

I'm an ardent England football fan.

I am nothing like the sort of person you 'describe' in your blog post.

#justsayin

@Great Aunt Annie - it hasn't been going that well for ireland to date...











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