please empty your brain below

Sorely tempted to publish the same comment repeatedly, at regular intervals, today..
Sorely tempted to publish the same comment repeatedly, at regular intervals, today..
I wonder if the constant barrage of safety and security messages is self defeating, does it actually create an environment that makes passengers feel safe and secure - otherwise why play all these messages all the time, would you rather work from home, drive or Uber in preference to risking death twice a day?
Many of the passengers are wearing earphones so don't hear the announcements anyway, and most of the rest have tuned all of the nagging messages out. Neither pays any attention to the background noise.
Wait till some Bozo introduces "This train is about to move." messages.
At Turnpike Lane they play low volume classical music round much of the station. It does make it a much more relaxing place to be.
Turnpike Lane gets my vote then.
Here in Hong Kong we get the same kind of messages, but in three languages for triple the pleasure :)
But you don't report whilst 'sat awaiting.'
At London Bridge National Rail station there is a similar range of announcements, but read out by a man or a woman on different platforms. But no one thought to adjust the times -- so that you get a male voice on one platform accompanied by a female voice on the opposite platform reading out the same warning, just slightly out of step with each other. Even more irritating.
Sorely tempted to publish the same comment repeatedly, at regular intervals, today.
...perhaps consideration should be given to playing some nature sounds as a calming effect?
As phrased, "Please use the handrail if you need to" is an entirely pointless announcement.
The safety announcement about not texting, reading E-Mails etc while on escalators or stairs is a potentially useful one, but the very people it is directed at are unlikely paying much attention to it if they're constantly fixated on their phone screens.
The permababble from the train's Public Annoyance system is one reason that I travel by car whenever possible. When I have to travel to London and use the Underground then an MP3 player and headphones are absolutely essential. The train used to take the strain, nowadays the train is the strain.

Holborn went mad with escalator announcements recently: you endured the babble coming up from the Piccadilly, then again on the next flight.

Thameslink and Southeastern onboard messages are the worst, especially if it's coastbound and the train divides en route. The daftest thing is when the crew tediously go through the rigmarole about arriving at Charing Cross and not leaving anything behind, only for the automated system to repeat all the same nonsense immediately afterwards.

Another pointless announcement is the one prohibiting skateboarding on platforms. A poster would suffice: there aren't many blind skateboarding passengers.
There are (of course!) guidelines about which announcements play and at the frequency they are ‘supposed to’ play at. This varies depending on not just the station’s location but the busyness.
Other silly announcements
"Stand behind the yellow line at all times" How do I get on the train then?

"I will be walking through the train"
"Please do not put your feet in the seats"
Both rather pointless when the train is rammed full - most passengers are unable to get any part of their anatomy anywhere near a seat, and walking along the train would only be possible by running along the roof.

At Waterloo Main Line
"Please stand back, this train is not scheduled to stop at this station"
It's going to make an awful mess of the concourse then.

On the train: "You must have a ticket to travel on our trains"
Horse, stable, bolt.

On an all-stations service leaving Waterloo
"We are scheduled to arrive at Guildford at xxxx". As there are non-stop services to Guildford, only two people should be interested in what time the stopper gets to the end of the line - one of them is driving and the other is making the announcement.
typo - "Please do not put your feet on the seats", of course.
The classical music thing may be to reduce anti-social behavior, although if it is played everywhere all the time it may be less effective.
A good write up on this subject - I couldnt give any examples in addition to those mentioned however - yet its a good record of how TfL/Rail companies actively breach disability access/the Equality Act 2010 on a large scale (they dont even give a single damn.) At least I dont have to listen to their crap though thats not the point - its they're lawbreakers lol!
Victoria (District&Circle) is the worst. You get the announcement "Please mind the gap between the train and the platform" EVERY MINUTE (or even more frequent). Also "The display board on this platform is defective. Please check the front of the train" every minute as well. This in addition to the regular see it say it sorted stuff and status updates. Waiting for a train at Victoria exposes you to a constant drone of announcements.
The local train company c2c fires off a similar fusillade of messages while you’re waiting on the platform. But rather than spread them out, these tend to be delivered in an intensive burst of continuous fire, so after a while they all go straight in one ear and out the other.

Finally, after tuning out whilst enduring this bombardment, you eventually get some useful, practical information about the actual train service being provided i.e. your reason for being there in the first place. Sometimes this is audible, other times not, depending on whether it coincides with another train arriving / leaving the station at the same time.

I was at Embankment station today and the announcements there were all but inaudible because of the general cacophony caused by the trains themselves. I think one of the reasons for putting them out may be because the rail companies can claim that in the event of a passenger accident, passengers were warned about the risks and therefore the companies are not liable to pay compensation.
Why not name all the stations rather than just Bow?
The comment by AlanBG reminds me of an early scene in the classic comedy film, Airplane!
Rog: are you suggesting some sort of prominent visual warning for those who cannot hear the announcements? On posters perhaps?
Apparently, the "See it, say it, sorted" message has to be played at least every 30 minutes (at least on National Rail services in April 2018)
The wife and I travelled into town this morning with eldest daughter who pointed out to us that announcements are suppressed on the morning peak Thameslink services.

And we are now in sunny Antwerp for a short break staying in a hotel right by Anvers Central. I mention this as the station has train tracks on three levels (the subway is separate). Oh, and the building and its approach architecture is beautiful. On the flip side every shop we passed on our short walk was a jewellers...
TfLRail do the same at their stations on GEML
Turnpike Lane has classical music in the evenings, probably to deter undesirable locals from loitering, and it is perhaps in the sort of area where locals would be undesirable.
But another station I use regularly, which also has classical music, is Euston Square, and I don't really understand why, as its customers/clientele/passengers seem to be mainly tourists and office workers.
Euston Square is on the route of the regular beggars who patrol between Euston,St. Pancras, & King's Cross.
On our local trains we get "Please familiarise yourself with the safety information available in poster form in each carriage", which of course everyone does... Perhaps if they said just "Please read the safety posters" people would realise the absurd bum-covering nature of it all.
I do get irritated at hearing Anne from ATOS at practically every single mainline station.

On the tube, the one I like least is the child announcing a safety warning at Baker Street.
Here we are:
FOI - "Stations PA guidelines"

dg writes: Thanks Felix!

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