please empty your brain below
Could we run a sweep on when this announcement gets canned. I predict next Tuesday as approvals will have to be granted, etc., instead of someone just taking responsibility and heading straight over from TfL towers

Read it, hear it, sorted...

Ken | 04.04.19 - 7:15 a.m. | #

Will this follow standard big organisation disaster management?

1 someone notices flaw in system
2 organisation claims system is required for some reason
3 reason given is illogical and gathers more derision than original flaw
4 organisation says it will look into situation in hope everyone forgets about it
5 someone brings matter to attention of someone of importance
6 important person asks why flaw exists
7 organisation makes complete u-turn and acts to remove flaw
8 organisation trumpets that it is listening to its customers
9 someone notes flaw in system still not fully dealt with or the solution is also flawed
10 repeat continuously

Will | 04.04.19 - 7:37 a.m. | #

Stratford announcements are excessive anyway, and often stop you hearing the on-train announcements telling you where the Central Line is going. (When they are actually working.) The eastbound Central Line platform has one indicator, which can't normally be read because the sun is behind it in the afternoons. At the other end of the platform, the place where an indicator could be located, sits an indicator showing the Shenfield trains instead. Confusing to visitors, who assume the Shenfield line runs on the Central Line tracks because of this oddity.

Alex Mckenna | 04.04.19 - 7:58 a.m. | #

The bus stop M of the Central Line. This one could run and run.

RogerB | 04.04.19 - 8:03 a.m. | #

It also plays in the subway, heard it yesterday about ten past five.

dg writes: Updated, thanks.

Train in on 14, quite full, walked half way down the platform to get a seat, train leaving in zero minutes but still sits there. Train arrives in platform 13, we still sit there, train now very full. Train arrives in platform 15. Train leaves platform 15 pretty much empty. Finally train from platform 14 leaves. Just glad to be on the move but of course that darned message will still be playing and there is a train in platform 13 - did it also leave empty from its "closed" platform? I'll never know as I prioritised getting home over finding out...

Brightside | 04.04.19 - 8:24 a.m. | #

It maybe annoying, but at least listening to it doesn't cause cancer, unlike Donald Trump's windmills!

Solar penguin | 04.04.19 - 8:58 a.m. | #

Let me guess, you got stuck at Stratford for an hour?

Southern Heights (Light Railway) | 04.04.19 - 8:58 a.m. | #

It’s also *really* long!
If there must be an announcement - why not make it just the last two lines?

James Scantlebury | 04.04.19 - 9:19 a.m. | #

Thanks for explaining the platform thing. Had vaguely wondered why platform 13 was neglected and unloved.
We await further updates!

Iain Mitchell | 04.04.19 - 9:23 a.m. | #

Have you complained to the station management? If so, how did they respond?

Medford | 04.04.19 - 9:24 a.m. | #

The probable reason it still gets played is that someone somewhere is still monitoring that station staff are following their instructions.

So, playing these things means you won't get a please explain why you didn't memo.

pete cummings | 04.04.19 - 9:25 a.m. | #

It sounds like Gruff Rhys Jones!
It even has the right pauses for audience laughter!

Joho | 04.04.19 - 9:36 a.m. | #

Must admit the crappy next train from platform signs are so small as to be useless. The Overground at Stratford is the same. You are left guess which train is next to depart too. Since its all computerised it cant be that difficult to install a huge bidirectional arrow for platforms 14/15 or on 1/2 with First Train underneath it? That and a No entry sign for Platform 13 when its closed like they have over the entrances when they have event day one way systems in operation.

Andrew Jarman | 04.04.19 - 9:52 a.m. | #

Perhaps they should have a sign or announcement saying anyone looking for Shakespeare's Birthplace has come to the the wrong Stratford (like the Beatles one at Abbey Road).

kev | 04.04.19 - 10:16 a.m. | #

There are occasions when the microscopic train indicator says platform 13 and if you push past the ‘platform not in use’ sign and ignore the announcements you’re rewarded with a near empty train that soon departs. I usually give a little wave to the poor soles squashed together on the other trains.

Often it’s difficult to get on platforms 14 & 15 late afternoon as there’s an avalanche of people escaping the platforms. It would be much better if they had a large next train indicator and used all the platforms.

Tony | 04.04.19 - 10:24 a.m. | #

Previous rant about the 'microscopic train indicator', when it was introduced in 2012:
https://diamondgeezer.blogspot.com/2012/07/upgraded-by-cretins.html

diamond geezer | Homepage | 04.04.19 - 10:30 a.m. | #

...maybe has a contract that includes "royalties" ...no everyone has a quantifiable cheery blokey voice

Grumpy Anon | 04.04.19 - 10:38 a.m. | #

Almost, but not quite, as annoying as Stratford's regular "unnouncement" claiming that smoking is against station policy (I forget the exact words). I'm not sure the station managers can have a meaningful policy in respect of statutory requirements other than complying with them. Even if the announcement were necessary, it might be slightly more effective if it stated that it was a criminal offence rather than "policy".

Rob | 04.04.19 - 10:55 a.m. | #

All announcements on Public Annoyance systems obey Gerry's Law, which states that the volume, repetition rate, length and clarity of a message is inversely proportional to its relevance.

Gerry | 04.04.19 - 10:58 a.m. | #

Three things:

1. I believe that vision-impaired people DO need this message, and given the frequency of the Jubilee 12pph (plays per hour) is probably necessary.

2. The latter half is quite clear. I think shortening the first half into the second suffices.

3. Re-recording the message probably costs extra money. Although in this case station controllers doing this manually can be an option.

Patrickov | 04.04.19 - 11:27 a.m. | #

The worst announcement problem at Stratford used to be the way stock announcements about no smoking and not leaving unattended items would override announcements about which stations a train served, frequently midflow. This was very annoying when some Shenfield Metro trains skipped particular stations, especially at peak hours when you couldn't rely on a paper timetable, and in those days there was no train indicator at the eastern end of platform 8 despite that being the end for the exits at most of the destination stations.

Tim Roll-Pickering | Homepage | 04.04.19 - 12:35 p.m. | #

Bad information drives out good. When people (vision impaired or not) have to develop mental techniques to screen out aural spam like this, something important is likely to get misfiled in the junk folder.

Malcolm | 04.04.19 - 12:43 p.m. | #

There should be an annual LMPESA award, with the winner being subjected to the victims (us) throwing rotten tomatoes at them.

scrumpy | 04.04.19 - 3:26 p.m. | #

On a similar theme, an announcement at North Greenwich told us the start date of some escalator work for the entire duration of the work. That was almost more irritating than calling it "improvement work" when it was just routine maintenance (although I suppose any maintenance is an improvement over just letting something fall apart).

Andrew S | 04.04.19 - 10:34 p.m. | #

Try getting a train from Whitechapel Westbound on the District/H&C in the morning! The usual platform person there pretty much talks constantly. I've started going another route to avoid it and feel like a right grumpy old man.

Adrian | 05.04.19 - 7:53 a.m. | #

Brightside emphasises the point that the message does not adapt to circumstances. Most of the time the system works well with trains arriving and departing promptly from 14 and 15 with absolutely no need for any message; after all the sign at the end of 13 SHOULD be enough!

However there are occasions when a train will arrive in 13; possibly defective to go into the depot but also if there is a backlog and / or due to a problem on 14 or 15. In this case it will depart in service invariably causing confusion, especially as a "Next train will depart from platform 13 in 2 minutes" announcement is played alongside the platform 13 closed one!

(As an aside in Brightside's case, it was probably that the one in 15 was "out of sequence," as they try to send trains out in order according to the timetable.)

Tim | 05.04.19 - 9:52 a.m. | #

I wonder if part of the problem is the way the station is managed. As your own blog posts have told us, this is one of the busiest stations in Britain. Most similar stations (with multiple train operators sharing facilities) are managed directly by National Rail, yet Stratford is managed by tfl rail (the almost Crossrail company), so have two thirds of zero experience in running such a large and complex station.

Don't even start me on the woeful national rail ticket facilities, which are an absolute joke for such a busy interchange.

IslandDweller | 05.04.19 - 4:36 p.m. | #

@IslandDweller; Stratford was originally managed by National Rail, but was transferred to Tfl when the Jubilee line arrived there in 2000. Staff were not happy about this at the time, partly because of complications such as pension transfer, as well as general doubts about having Tfl as an employer .
The ticket office facilities have actually improved since then, but are still not adequate for such a busy station.
As for the announcement, I change at Stratford regularly and I've always thought that it's repeated too much.

amber | 06.04.19 - 11:34 a.m. | #

Haven't heard it recently.
Which is nice.

diamond geezer | Homepage | 25.04.19 - 8:47 a.m. | #











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