please empty your brain below

Explain social distancing to my three teenage children. They were high as kites on Friday with the prospect of no school until September (at the earliest) - that all came crashing down over the weekend as the realisation that they weren’t going to be able to see their friends dawned.
If you need to know about self-isolation and social distancing, just have a chat to an older person. Some of them have been perfecting the art for years and not always willingly.
I’m interested in seeing how hair styles change during this
Section C is easy: "like Elsa in the first one".
Some people don't see this virus thing as being relevant to them, and regard the economic pain (which many may struggle for years to recover from, if at all) as being disproportionate to the actual threat to (their) life - or 'what's the point of saving the lives of those who'll be dead soon anyway'.

I worry that all the economic damage and high government borrowing will result in quite nasty consequences a few years down the line.
Having won a referendum campaign and election based on getting people to not listen to experts, the PM is finding it frustratingly hard to get people to listen experts....
If the wait for an online grocery shop was only two weeks then we’d all be fine. Instead most supermarkets have no slots whatsoever as they’re fully booked up for sometimes four weeks.
Is that open book?
My kids have been at home for a week now, the oldest said last Thursday that she wanted to go back to school already. I've been working at home all this time too, the novelty has worn off now.

Day 3 of lockdown in Munich (1000+ cases in the city). My wife has ventured out to the shops - I'm guessing she's got the place to her self...
When I was a child very many years ago and complained about not going out I would have been told to read a book or listen to the wireless I.e. radio
A telephone was for emergencies and situated in a large box a quarter of a mile away.
And there was a war on.
“But we were ‘appy see”
where i live i try not to mix with people anyway, so this is no difference for me.
What worries me is that the children of essential workers are still allowed to go to school together.

If a virus gets established in that school, then it will be carried home to the same essential workers that they are trying to protect.
Staying home and playing online games is what my boys have been preparing for throughout their teenage years!
They've got this!

As long as they don't eat me out of house and home within a day, so've I!
This is what we pay our money for. Stay safe, DG, your readers need you.
good comments today ... i especially like those of Temp, bert and Joe whose i'd like to chalk up in big letters on the hoardings of the nearest building site.
A brilliant distillation of the unforgivable lack of clarity in the current messaging.

The PM's somewhat incredulous reaction to a question about involving the police told us a lot. Like a significant part of the population, it seems he is not yet mentally prepared for what's going to have to happen next.
Correct Social Distancing behavior, thats an easy one.

Just imagine its one of those exceptionally cold days, say -10C, when everybody's exhalation turns instantly into a condensation cloud in front of the face the moment it hits the frigid air. Just stay out of those invisible condensation clouds around other people and you reduce the potential viral load exposure by up to 99%.

Stay safe. And keep your distance. You really dont want to get this. Or give it to loved ones.
Today the supermarket was OK, fully stocked chiller cabinets and fruit and veg, still no pasta, rice, sanitizer and toilet paper, some recovery in tinned food, kitchen towels and tissues.

They have joined others in putting tape on the floor, so you don't stand too close together at the checkouts, the only problem is that they have folded the self service queue in half - so you may be 1m behind the person in front, but next to the one going the other way.

Still gaps in the alcohol section, even the single malts have gone, so no Highland Park 12 year (its on offer and its lovely).

Seeing groups of people walking close together, it's difficult to tell whether they all belong to the same household, which would make it ok, or not, which would be breaking the rules. If enforcement starts, ID cards might be necessary to resolve such issues.
The government communications strategy has been woeful. I've had a tough time trying to convince a friend (University educated, senior management job) that she can't arrange social gatherings. The message she had perceived was it was only the 'at risk' people who had to obey the social distance rules.
Suspect the problem is at the top - he just wants to play the buffoon as usual and he is incapable of facing up to the enormity of what he had to deal with.
Malcolm, groups of people should keep a safe distance when out and about whether they're in the same household or not. No need for IDs or difficult policing.
Ah well, off to the bunker with my 2 tins of corned beef and 738 toilet rolls it is then, stay safe everyone.
Tina, there may be a reason why restricting social isolation, including supermarket entry to only one family member, is a good idea. Let’s imagine that a group of mum, dad and kids are all unknowingly infected. Each then may cough or sneeze near goods on the shelves, multiplying the risk. Then along comes another shopper to buy those goods. He/she will be taking the virus home with them. I read that it can survive at least several days on food packaging. Tins of fruit in juice might be the worst risk, as the juice washes over the lid on opening. And supermarket trolleys & baskets may also contain nastiness.

In Spain there are rules at both my local supermarket and chemists: one family member as above, hand sanitiser on entry and exit, 5 feet distance to anyone else at all times. I’ve only once seen shortages, on one day a fortnight ago before these rules were introduced, since then all ok. So no need to panic buy. But, I fear, plenty of reasons to panic.
I see a new syllabus has just been published!
I bought a load of paint tonight. Should keep me busy.

However having been back in UK 5 days yet to find any hand cleanser, which was widespread in Thailand and Vietnam (which, maybe coincidentally, have far lower cases).
I've been ill for weeks and months at a time. Ask me about social distancing you bastards! I'm JUDGING YOU ALL VERY BADLY. Now I'm expected to provide chat on the phone when you didn't bother when I was ill. I have top tips for dealing with it but you will have to become comfortable with yourselves. And I don't think any of you are ready.
Much more to come, sadly, and I agree that we are not ready. This evening's rules and enforcement are still too loose and the 'travelling to work' bit too open to interpretation.

For a bit of light relief, here is a short allegory for the toilet roll pan(ic)demic

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