please empty your brain below

The R9 is even shorter in the early morning, (when its clientele are more interested in getting to the station than the shops) as it does not loop-the-loop in Orpington until about 0845.
"Our driver spots that the lights ahead onto the A224 are green and speeds up a little to make sure we get through". This would forgive him a multitude of sins in my book. Most drivers slow down on approaching green lights in case they turn red. Some even seem to wait for them to do so!
There must be plenty of content for a bus etiquette book - the ideal gift...
<looks at final photo>

The Scania single deck on the 358 is one of the four ex 293 buses that has replaced the four Mercedes Citaros that were destroyed in last November's arson attack on Metrobus's garage at Green Street Green.
Sounds like a Bob Newhart-trained driver.
"There's something about this driver's attitude I can't quite put my finger on."

I can, we get them all the time in this major city which isn't London.

It's called "being an arse".
Hmm, could it be that the bus driver's attitude is born out of having to drive around the Ramsden Estate? A place that doesn't tend to show up well in the local press reports.
End of shift driving.

If they were a truly skilled driver then judicious sharp braking would have flung the can down to the front of the bus, then opening the doors on a right turn would have flung it out onto the road.

Officially all stops are now request, the red and white flag thing is now irrelevant.
I hope you handed the driver a discount card for The Charm School before you alighted.

[ BTW: Thankyou for employing the much-underused 'alight' - good to see that some regions of The Empire are still in working order ].
I thought they'd changed all London stops to NOT be request stops? Not turned them all to request stops?
I'd agree that the driver may have been an unsuitable choice, or else he was having a bad day. I admired the Reading system of recruiting only non-holders of PCV licenses, since driving can be taught but customer skills and attitudes are harder.
I've heard of some half-baked official approach whereby every stop is now a request stop (ie the bus won't stop if it dosen't need to) but drivers are meant to respond to indications that passengers do want to get on such as those employed by DG. PC may well be along shortly to quote from the infamous Red Book used to train bus drivers.
From the 2014 Big Red Book:

As your bus reaches the stop...

1. Keep an eye out for intending passengers at all times. You must stop to pick up anyone waiting to board your bus:
- No matter what kind of stop it is (red or white stop flag)
- Whether they have put their hand out or not
- Any time, day or night

The reason for this is that people with visual or other hidden impairments or visitors to London may not know they have to put their hand out or may not be able to.
I have an increasing suspicion that my R9 bus driver may have been an impetuous bullshitter.
Standard bus driver customer service in Brum, at least in the 80s and 90s.

Birmingham's buses have longed worked on an exact fare system, but woe betide you if you have the temerity to ask the driver to tell you the fare to somewhere. Presumably you're supposed to somehow magically know it.
I'm curious to know why the routes around Orpington use the R prefix. I can't see anywhere local with a placename starting with R, other than the Ramsden Estate!

dg writes: R is for Roundabout, because.
As regards bus stop etiquette:

When I lived in Homerton, I used to board the 488 in Kenworthy Road. The 488 was the only bus serving the stop. Drivers would stop whether I put my hand out or not. If I hadn't quite reached the stop and broke into a run, they would almost always stop.

One day, with the bus in view turning from Wick Road into Kenworthy Road, an elderly party came out from a house near the stop. Elderly Party waved a stick as the bus pulled up. After we boarded, Elderly Party rebuked me in the following terms: we would have missed the bus if it had not been for Elderly Party, because I couldn't be bothered to put my hand out.

I pointed out to Elderly Party that:
a) the driver was slowing down;
b) he was steering the bus toward the kerb;
c) he was signalling with the left hand blinker.

Not good enough; the driver had only done all those things because Elderly Party had told him to. Were the other passengers sniggering at me because of my well-derved rebuke?
To be pedantic there is no council housing stock in Orpington. The London Borough of Bromley sold the stock initially to Broomleigh Housing Association many years ago
Sometimes double deckers do turn up on the R9 - perhaps that would've made the experience a bit nicer!
I would guess that R-pington's local buses have an R prefix because an "O" would be prone to confusion with a leading zero, and the "Roundabout" name was then contrived to match the prefix.
I’m intrigued by the reference to the ‘bus company private car’ - could someone elaborate on this for me please?
When a bus driver's duty terminates somewhere that isn't a depot, a car is sometimes provided to ferry them back to base.

Often the bus driver taking over the bus duty arrives in the car, and the bus driver ending their duty drives it away.

In this case, because Orpington station's a busy terminus, there were four staff in the car heading back to the Go-Ahead garage at Green Street Green.
Sorry you got a grumpy jobsworth for your ride.
Made for good reading though!
Only recently discovered your blog and as an ex resident from Orpington I have to say that your description of the Ramsden estate and its surroundings are spot on. Very enjoyable daily reading. Thanks.










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