please empty your brain below
Guilty to all of them except the last three.

It’s called doing a dynamic risk assessment !

Avrev | 03.12.18 - 7:14 a.m. | #

I always try and wait for the green man when there are kids about. But then I usually wait for the green man anyway.

Kirk | 03.12.18 - 7:22 a.m. | #

Walking down the cycle lane because the pavement has been halved to accommodate it and all the street furniture, trees and overhanging greenery are on the pedestrian side so there's no room for people to pass.

Walking in a huge group (2 or more) but removing to move over for pedestrians coming the other way forcing them in to the road or cycle lane.

MKIan | 03.12.18 - 7:42 a.m. | #

Guilty of a considerable portion of these. Sometimes you just have to do them - awkward junctions built not for pedestrians but the world of the car, or very selfish car drivers who'd like to pretend they haven't seen you.

Call me impatient, but when I die, I'd like to not look back and see I spent a third of my time here waiting to cross roads.

Medford | 03.12.18 - 7:44 a.m. | #

Guilty as charged.

Dominic | 03.12.18 - 7:45 a.m. | #

Guilty as charged, m'lud, tens of thousands of offences to be taken into consideration except perhaps in my 70s 'vaulting the railings'. More seriously, don't do this in the States. On a tour stop, saw the missus the other side of the road in Rodeo Drive, looked left, right and left again, crossed and got a good b*ll*ck*ng from the nearby policeman!

J. | 03.12.18 - 8:05 a.m. | #

There's also another species - the non guerrilla pedestrian who won't push the button, either through laziness or ignorance, merely waiting for someone else to do so or hoping for a break in the traffic - some hope at my local crossing.

Red man? Shouldn't that be gender neutral in this day and age?

Tim | 03.12.18 - 8:21 a.m. | #

Crossing when the red man appears (and variations thereof) - I was on the jury of the trial of a driver who hit and killed a girl who did just that, rushed across holding a bus up and appeared the other side at the same time as a car.

Add that to your 'dynamic risk assessment'

Steve | 03.12.18 - 8:43 a.m. | #

Crossing the road half way before realising some bxxxxr has decided to overtake the front vehicle you have passed in front of hoping for a clear route on the far lane. You then bolt in front of the overtaking car and give them a bit of added excitement they hadn't bargained for.

B | 03.12.18 - 8:50 a.m. | #

I never vault the railings. As for the rest that depends on the time and place.

Leuconoe | 03.12.18 - 8:51 a.m. | #

The guerilla pedestrian may only be a danger to themselves, in which case we could heartlessly think of it as evolution in action. Or they may a danger to other people as well, in which case we could legitimately take umbrage at their recklessness in putting others at risk.

Perhaps worth remembering that many perhaps most pedestrians are at times cyclists and/or motorists, and almost all motorists and cyclists are pedestrians too. And most people think they are better than the average. Hell is other people.

Andrew | 03.12.18 - 9:15 a.m. | #

I'm afraid I'm quite militant about ignoring nods and waves from drivers who are letting me cross.

"Sorry, Mr. Driver, but I'll cross when I'm happy that it's safe, not when you tell me to."

Michael Churchill | 03.12.18 - 9:15 a.m. | #

Crossing when the man turns red because the traffic hasn't started moving yet.

Following other people who have done so who are preventing the traffic from moving.

kev | 03.12.18 - 9:56 a.m. | #

"Crossing when the only approaching traffic is a bike and that doesn't count.".
Ooh.
Each day I cycle in to my village centre for some local shopping, and exercise and fresh air. There are plenty of pedestrians who just walk across the road without looking, guess they can't hear a motor vehicle and think it must be clear.
But the ones that really get me are the ones who stop, look each way, including looking right at me, then walk across anyway. If I'm far enough away I ring my bell, but if not I brake and then zoom behind then and ring my bell loudly as I do.

But as a pedestrian who grew up in an inner city, I do all the guerrilla crossing other than not looking.

Joho | 03.12.18 - 10:04 a.m. | #

Good luck to those programming autonomous vehicles to predict human pedestrian behaviour . . .

ian brooker | 03.12.18 - 10:07 a.m. | #

As a law abiding pedestrian I have to confess that I’m not guilty of most of those crimes. I do admit to leaping out of my Dad's car as a teenager to push the button on a pedestrian crossing so that the traffic had to stop and he had a chance of getting out of side road though.

Disappointed, as reading the title of your post I was hoping for some guerilla advice as to how we could stop drivers parking on footpaths. It has reached epedemic proportions here, outside of London, and I want to tell you this as I am expecting to be killed soon, whilst having to walk in the road due to these thoughtless and uncaring beggars.

Love the blog; always pleased to see a new post from you.

Val | 03.12.18 - 10:08 a.m. | #

As a daily London cyclist, I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve been shouted at by a pedestrian for “appearing out of nowhere” - when they’re the ones in the middle of a road, and paying no attention to their surroundings.

CJS | 03.12.18 - 10:23 a.m. | #

I saw a pedestrian crossing a motorway - the M57 between Switch Island and the East Lancs Road - pushing a pram!

Tim | 03.12.18 - 10:26 a.m. | #

For those who only listen for traffic - beware the electric car!!! We have one and the number of people who just walk out without looking because it 'sounded' clear!

The nearest I have come to being run over was a few weeks ago, walking out of my own driveway and almost straight into a cyclist on the pavement, hidden by the hedge!

Cornish Cockney | 03.12.18 - 10:29 a.m. | #

Guilty as charged... though I would be remiss not to point out that, in this case:
'Crossing because nothing's coming.... ah, except for the car which forgot to indicate.'
The driver is breaking the law. The pedestrian is not.

As someone who usually uses a car or my own two feet to get about in Inner London, I am far more annoyed by drivers who don't indicate than by oblivious pedestrians. The first is a risk to other drivers, buses, bicycles, and pedestrians. The second is only a menace to him- or herself.

Barbicanite | 03.12.18 - 10:47 a.m. | #

Any of the across the cycle lane might work in the UK, But in any Dutch city/Town would lead to all sorts of problems.

YDU | 03.12.18 - 11:00 a.m. | #

"because you can contrive a gap in the traffic" - DG, liking the so appropriate use of the word contrive. Thanks for your blog, I enjoy reading it every day.

Chessington Resident | 03.12.18 - 11:18 a.m. | #

I always stagger

Caz | 03.12.18 - 11:29 a.m. | #

All the references to some pedestrians being a danger "only to themselves" rather miss out on the fact that a driver or cyclist involved in any contact with a pedestrian, severe or otherwise, will be at least badly shaken up, possibly injured and possibly made temporarily or permanently unable to drive/cycle.

Malcolm | 03.12.18 - 11:33 a.m. | #

In a collision between a cyclist and a pedestrian, it is not necessarily the pedestrian who comes off worst.

timbo again | Homepage | 03.12.18 - 11:52 a.m. | #

Guilty of most. I must admit to have been caught out by cycle lanes/infrastructure which didn't exist when I previous crossed that road!

On paths where someone had painted a line down the middle with cyclists on one side and pedestrians on the other, especially for ones down alleys or in parks, does ANYONE actually obey those instructions?

Mikey C | 03.12.18 - 12:03 p.m. | #

When I’m driving I obey the rules of the road. When I’m cycling I obey the rules of the road. When I’m a pedestrian, try as I might, it is becoming increasingly difficult to obey the rules. Infrastructure changes, mostly to the benefit of cyclists, seem to be nearly always to the detriment of pedestrians. The absolute worst offending example I can think of is the new cycle lane at the Elephant that cuts a very busy pavement in two, and not even in a straight line, weaving as it does from Newington Butts to St George’s Road. Other examples being the bus stop islands,of which there are more and more; and rediculously staggered pelican crossings with waits of minutes at the middle stage.

Joe | 03.12.18 - 12:21 p.m. | #

My worst offence: After getting out of my office, I cross at the nearest T-junction, perfectly normal crossing, and perfectly in the proper period of green. After that though, I rush along the kerb edge, on the wrong side of the barriers, trying to gain as much time before the original light goes red, because by then my *next* crossing will be in perfect green. If I walk on the normal pavement, which is more often than not crowded, I will probably miss the big crossing and, possibly, my next bus home.

Patrickov | 03.12.18 - 12:25 p.m. | #

Something as a visitor I notice a lot; people who have used a crossing for years and are familiar with the traffic pattern decide to cross on red and make it safely to the other side. Other people, usually tourists, see this and follow their lead. Except they're a second or two behind them and have to scatter when traffic comes at them from around a corner.

dg writes: I should definitely have included that one.

Bob | 03.12.18 - 12:43 p.m. | #

A colleague once expressed surprise that I, well known as a bit of a contrarian and libertarian, waited for the green man at a crossing near the office. I responded that it was so that I could accomplish my walk home on autopilot whilst using my brain for something else.

What about the guerilla pedestrian who knows which buses will be turning and which won't?

Sarah | Homepage | 03.12.18 - 2:44 p.m. | #

Guilty of most of these at some time or another.

I do though try to walk on the pavement but in places in Central London it is exceedingly difficult where building contractors have been allowed to appropriate the space for their purposes, and the “safe” diverts are so lengthy and out-of-the-way, they can almost send you into a different borough.

These “temporary works” can last months and they can take well over half the available pavement space, requiring us pedestrians to slalom our way along trying to avoid those coming in the other direction, or just walk along the carriageway. If I do walk in the road I try to do so wherever possible, facing the oncoming traffic.

Also, in my home village, in places the state of the pavements are so poor that the road offers a much better surface to walk on.

IanD | 03.12.18 - 3:25 p.m. | #

I hate these newer pedestrian crossings where the red/green persons are to your right, often concealed by a fat/tall person. Also, at crossroads, the red/green man you can see on the far side is not for you but for the people crossing the perpendicular road. Not so bad by day, but tricky on a rainy night, especially if the road is sloping up.

Peter | 03.12.18 - 4:02 p.m. | #

Mikey C asks: “On paths where someone had painted a line down the middle with cyclists on one side and pedestrians on the other...does ANYONE actually obey those instructions?”.

Well, round my way, the cyclists certainly don’t, especially when they’re overtaking each other. Pedestrians sometimes don’t realise there is a line, but otherwise tend to obey them, because there’s no advantage in not doing.

Otherwise, a repeat offender on all but the last three...

Baldassaro | 03.12.18 - 4:07 p.m. | #

The city of Bath was on the news yesterday due to total gridlock of all roads for miles around. The main problem seemed to be continuous streams of pedestrians on crossings preventing traffic from moving, regardless of the state of the lights. This was apparently due to a Christmas market coinciding with a big rugby match. The chaos was unprecedented, with traffic performing three point turns all over main roads, and then getting stuck in residental rat-runs. I was just trying to collect a parcel from the sorting office, expecting it to be quiet, but what should have taken about half an hour took about four.

kev | 03.12.18 - 4:18 p.m. | #

Also "Walking along the cycle lane rather than the pavement because it's not explicit which coloured surface is which."

diamond geezer | Homepage | 03.12.18 - 4:30 p.m. | #

If I didn't cross between parked cars I would never be able to cross my road.

Barry | 03.12.18 - 5:50 p.m. | #

@earlier comment about people refusing to push the button to get the traffic to stop; devout (if that's the word I want) Jews won't push the button on their Sabbath, they have to wait till someone else does it.

amber | 03.12.18 - 6:12 p.m. | #

My new favourite is walking out into slow moving traffic and raising your hand policeman-style to halt the traffic whilst you cross. This has always worked for me ( so far ).

drD | 03.12.18 - 6:15 p.m. | #

@drD Increase your satisfaction with drivers who have stopped for you by strolling out and giving an enthusiastic thumbs up. You'd be amazed how many respond in kind before realising they have taken themselves back to being groovy in the 1970s.

There is also the 'pretending to ride an imaginary horse' when using a pegasus crossing. Although I don't think that is illegal.

GJ | 03.12.18 - 7:19 p.m. | #

This is me totally, if I can cross with a safeish distance then I will

Rachel | 03.12.18 - 8:29 p.m. | #

Re: "Pushing the button, then crossing on red because there's a gap in the traffic." That is why there should be an 'off' button, i.e. you were content to wait for the green man but now you've seen a gap you're comfortable with. If no-one else is waiting to cross, why inconvenience the drivers who turn up 20 seconds after you've got to the other side? (I'm very much a guerilla pedestrian, I never push the button if I can see a gap, or if I know the road and that a gap will be coming).

Related type: "presses the button on auto-pilot, looks up and sees no traffic, then crosses anyway". Causing the driver in the far distance (me) to gnash teeth, knowing they'll reach the lights just as they pointlessly turn red.

Graham | 03.12.18 - 9:51 p.m. | #

People with babies in buggies at crossings who unthinkingly position the child right on the edge with the front wheels projecting beyond the line of the railings, just inches away from the passing fumes and traffic thundering past - a complete horror. I was once on my bike and thought I was going to get rammed so I said they should be more thoughtful about their child. Of course the response was a resounding "F-Off"

On the list of three at the end, there is also a category for carrying a cup of coffee. Some walk out following the cup of coffee as if it's a way of clearing the road, rather than looking at the traffic.

One I'm guilty of: Walking past crowded bus stops on the road rather than picking my way through the throng.

NickW | 03.12.18 - 10:06 p.m. | #

Not knowing which side of the pedestrian/cyclist line to walk because whoever put up the signs had the cyclists on the left - in both directions!

timbo again | Homepage | 03.12.18 - 10:09 p.m. | #

Aimlessly crossing the road while engaged in heated verbal exchange on the phone, completely oblivious to double deck bus bearing down to pull in to its stop.

BobS | 03.12.18 - 11:17 p.m. | #

Guilty to every single one on the list. I also put my hand out to say thank you and cross even when the driver clearly had no intention of stopping but now they have to

Ethan | 04.12.18 - 12:06 a.m. | #

People who waddle along with their arms sticking out at about 45 degrees making it next to impossible to pass them on narrow paths. A cigarette dangling from their fingers with the lit end away from their bodies makes passing even more of a challenge.

James | 04.12.18 - 8:01 a.m. | #

I happen to be in Hong Kong today, so a late reader of yesterday's post.

There are as many people here as in the UK who need to consult their smartphone the whole of the time that they are crossing. It's quite a significant proportion.

Martin | 04.12.18 - 11:20 a.m. | #











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