please empty your brain below

Ha ha ha !

Alas, electing a non-embarrassing Mayor is already not an option.

That made me laugh my head off.

However, I do believe that currently the correct protocol on the Internet is to to laugh one's bottom off. Consider it done.

Sheer brilliance. Cheers DG.

PS What is a space octopus?

Never mind the gaspipe, what about replacing the whole schemozzle with holographic projections. Security worries solved :)

"Simultaneous suspension of Jubilee and Central lines on busiest evening of Games"

Now THAT is highly probable...


I, for one, welcome our new space octopus overlords.

Excellent. I think there's scope for a meme generator where the various parts of these risks are mixed up to generate new, more ridiculous risks. LOCOG can then just hit F5 and mitigate accordingly.

Surface to Air Missiles on Shooters Hill.. you couldn't make it up!

What next? Nuclear powered SubmarineS armed with Trident invisibly patrolling the Thames.



You think it'll be possible to find enough Boris Bikes to barricade those Zil Lanes then?

I'm looking forward to a space octopus descending, getting elected Mayor of London, and then waving eight flags in an embarrassing manner in front of a global audience of three billion.

Alternatively, we might now have an explanation for what's going on with Boris' hair.

So someone leaked LOCOG's risk assesssment to you then? ;-)

Perhaps the Drought now affecting London will come to an end when the Olympics start.
If not no water for the athletes and visitors could be another "risk" factor!


"Surface to Air Missiles on Shooters Hill."

Well it could get interesting if they forget to turn the Sea Vipers off (actually, why don't they just park a type 45 in the Thames?) during the opening and closing firework ceremony.

If they have to use the surface to air missiles that close to the Olympic park, the bits will probably land there anyway.

I kind of like the idea of the stadium lit up by Olympic torches in the crowd - very atmospheric!

Hilarious! (and so true). Missiles on Shooters Hill; Archers in Bow - any other mixed metaphor geographical suggestions? There could be a quiz here.

Brilliant

Kind regards

Gas deployment: Beckton.
Guard dogs: Barking.
Cost of security: Wapping.
Payback: Deptford.

Sorry, best I could do.

Imagining the space octopus being beamed down during the opening ceremony made me chuckle. Excellent post DG. :-)

Hahahahahaha!! DG at his best! Brilliant.

Today I bought some London Prepares tickets for Sat 5 May. £30 paid for tickets for the hockey, wheelchair tennis, water polo, and the athletics/opening of the stadium & my train fare from Beckenham ! That's value

"Use Olympic flame to light Olympic torches and distribute amongst crowd"

How exactly? It's a holographic flame!
Locog contingency - Implemented by cretins.

Oh, and you just gotta love the irony of a missile base on "Shooters" Hill.

You might be closer than you think with the Pepsi thing.

http://www.socialistworker.co.uk/art.php?id=27819

The last bit about the Nike / Adidas clash is for real, but if competitors do collect medals bare foot, they best watch out that Saul Zaentz Company doesn't sue them for infringement of a Hobbit trademark.

I'm just clearing emails & came across this, having sent a link to a friend who was working on the Olympics.

A bit frightened by this:

"Actor who plays mascot Mandeville accused of child molestation"










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