please empty your brain below

1st? 2nd? 3rd? 4th? 5th? 6th? 7th? 8th? 9th? (10th?) (11th?)

8th :p

Aural pollution.

And regulars filter it all out, so that when something important happens (this train will now terminate at Seven Sisters / is diverted to Amersham / will not be stopping at Kings Cross/ is on fire) nobody is listening any more.

I would think the most verbose is the one in use! So #10 for me.

Hilarious.

yeah, eighth one.

maybe once a year we could have a special "no audio announcements day" or something just to see how everyone gets on.

The last one will be "correct" one for the Victoria line I am sure.

I've got so fed up with the interminable announcements on the Bakerloo line I don't take my headphones off when I hear the driver now.

although... 11th one? maybe? per chance?

As a seasoned Victoria line traveller, I'd say it's the sixth one. However, I wouldn't be surprised if they use the awfully verbose tenth one sometimes. I don't think I hear the eleventh one at all now.

Isn't this the correct one?

I am concerned that the last announcement lacks any advice on the importance of breathing in, and then out, in order for passengers to remain conscious. Can we start a campaign?

Mesdames et Messieurs . . .

I don't think I've ever heard "thank you for travelling on the ... line", unless the 2009 TS does that.

Has anyone ever noticed the platform announcement with the endless repeating of words to the effect of "this train calls at all stations to Epping" or whatever. They shouldn't even need to mention that, because it's only an issue on the Met.

Thing is, I've heard them still say "all stations" from even when a station is closed for repairs. Train isn't calling at "all stations" then.

And as for "this station has step-free access", what sort of person, who needs step-free access, gets on a train without finding out whether the intended exit has step-free access?

Get rid of the information pollution TfL.

JaJaWa - The 92 stock has a "Thank you for travelling on the Central Line" announcement.

yeah, but try taking the First Capital connect suburban services from Kings Cross, with no announcements, and the signs on the platforms unlit and too dark too read and too spread out to see from every seat anyway, and it's not your usual train so you don't know exactly how many stops it is till your station and then see how you like your silence. Or try being blind and wanting to travel independently all the same. There's got to be a happy medium between constant meaningless announcements and useful information.

I'm fairly sure it's (normally) the sixth one. Which, contrary to some of the discussion above, consists solely of useful information. LU is pretty good at ensuring that on-train announcements are relevant.

(the same isn't true for platform announcements or for announcements on National Rail trains, admittedly).

Max: AIUI 'all stations' is for the benefit of infrequent Tube users, who don't know that the Met is the only line to skip stops (contra NR and other metros worldwide).

Martin: really? I've never heard it, although admittedly I've never commuted on the Central. It's surely not played at every stop.

We are often thanked for travelling on the Jubilee line.

4th

If it is the last one, as I fear, then I am wondering whether DG remembered it, or wrote it down/recorded it as he heard it?

But it is the Summer Solstice. Shouldn't we have a post related to today's extraordinary amount of life-giving daylight? Much more dg-ish. This post could have been anyday. Please dg, tell me why I feel better today than for the rest of the year - even when I'm listening to all this aural chaff.

dg writes: Sorry, but you can't have a solstice post every year.

I suspect its the last one, but would expect it to be 9 or 10 with all the information pollution.
They're trailing next station announcements of the Glasgow subway which is just plain stupid - all trains go round and round in a circle (either cw or ccw), it takes 20 mins so even if you do get on the wrong direction u'll still get to where you were going.

c/trailing/trialling


7th?

Providing it is soon the last one (silence) then i'll be happy!

Oh, and john b, technically that is not correct: The Piccadilly line also skips (Turnham Green), and that definitely causes confusion on occasions (I work near Turnham Green, for a company which is basically an overseas operation, and i get regular visitors from other offices arriving via Heathrow. People not understanding late/early is so frequent for me, that i write in capital letter and several languages that "you must change at Acton Town because the Piccadilly line does not stop at Turnham Green". I have had more than one who has gone through to Hammersmith by accident, then instead of getting the district has somehow got back on the Picc and gone through to Acton Town yet again.

((sorry for the off topic post))

There's the "Beggars and buskers" one. I think it begins "Beggars and buskers operate near this station. Please do not encourage them by giving them any of your money."

Do they really think people will stop trying to beg money if less people give them money? As if it's Tfl's business who I give my money to.

There was a very annoying (human) announcer at Tower Hill, who would announce the next train on platform 1 was a district line train to Richmond/Ealing/Wimbledon, calling at...and then name, in order, every single station. (not sure what she did if it was a circle line - and thus ending at Edgware Road. I only seemed to be there when a District was the next train out) I presume she was told to stop, as I haven't had it inflicted on my ears for a bit now.

I expect it was the 11th. Haven't been on the Vicky for a few months so can't remember what is normal.

All of the above (at different times?)

Sadly it's not going to be <silence> is it! *sigh*

disgruntled: RE: FCC services from Kings Cross.

I'll have you know I got on one of those at Potters Bar today and heard a "thistrainwillbecallingathatfieldandwelwyngardencitypleasemindthedoors" and as soon as he said mind the doors beeped and closed!

I think that's the closest to a proper announcement we'll get on FCC trains for a while (except for the 365s which never work) ;)

And on to the actual comment... I'd say the second last one, obviously!

I'm guessing #7. The first time I travelled on 2009 stock I remember being surprised to hear it announce what side the doors would open at every station, so it can't be less than #6. I can't see LUL going "Thank you for travelling" (unlike South West Trains, sigh), so probably not #8. Advice to take all belongings seems more or less in character.

People complaining about aural pollution: Funny how I never hear blind people complain about there being too many announcements. Maybe you ought to exercise a little more empathy with your fellow travellers? Not everybody can instantly tell what line's platform they've walked onto by reading the coloured strip, or work out which station they've stopped at without counting the number of times the doors opened since they got on, or indeed work out which side the doors opened on.

As for the solstice, the only impact it has had on a bedroom-dwelling internet commenter such as myself is that I've had to close the curtains to stop the sun from shining directly into my eyes and obscuring the monitor.

*applause*

Possibly all of them, at different times?

Depends on how much the driver likes the sound of his own voice?













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